Ruby Red was born out of grief. She’s nine. She’s spunky. She wears her heart on her sleeve. She appeared out of the blue and stole the first line of my next novel. She took off running and I’ve been tagging along ever since.

It’s difficult to make sense of life after both your sister and brother die within a few months of each other like Ruby’s did. Her whole world turned upside down so Ruby turned to blogging to try and put things “right” again.

Friday, January 17, 2014

Ruby Red: What's In A Name?

Mama took a quiz today ’bout which one a the Downton Abbey people you are ‘n she’s Anna Bates. Mama smiled at that. Her Mama’s best friend was named Anna ‘n her Mama’s name is Amy. Mama said that when she was a little girl she had her future all planned out. First she’d marry a prince ‘n then she’d have a daughter named Shelley Sue ‘n after that she’d have twin girls—Anna ‘n Amy. Well, she got Daddy first who isn’t zactally a real prince like in Cinderella but she thinks he’s enough of a prince to make her happy, then she got a daughter but Prince Daddy didn’t like the name Shelley Sue ‘n wanted to name her after his grandmother, Loraine. So Mama did. Then low ‘n b’hold she gets twins! Me ‘n Rubin. So the names Amy ‘n Anna didn’t work ‘n she let Daddy name us too. But I already talked ’bout that.

I wonder if Rubin’d been a girl if I’d be Amy or Anna? I think I’d like to be Anna ’cause like Mama says, “Every Anna I ever met had the sweetest heart,” ‘n I want people to think that ’bout me. I been so blue since Loraine ‘n Rubin left me that I been too mad to be sweet. Like yesterday. Me ’n Jessie Mobley was playin’ in my room when Bondi jumped on my lap ‘n snuggled down ‘n purred so nice. Jessie Mobly wanted to play with him. She got his Ping-Pong ball ‘n started bouncin’ it then she tried to get Bondi to jump a my lap. I hugged him to my chest ‘n told her to leave my kitty alone. Well she stuck her bottom lip out ‘n looked so sad like she wanted to cry. I didn’t say nothin’. I didn’t know what to say. Pretty soon she said she’d see me tomorrow at school. I didn’t want her to go. My heart got a big ache in it. I just sat there rockin’ Bondi in my arms ‘n tryin’ not to let my tears get him all wet.

What I don’t get is why did Loraine ‘n Rubin both go ‘n leave me? Loraine couldn’t help dyin’ cause a her lame heart. It was inev…inevitable Daddy said but shook his head like he don’t believe it. It ain’t…it’s not fair that I was sittin’ right next to Rubin on the bus when it flipped over. Why did he go ‘n die just like that ‘n I didn’t even get a dern scratch? It was like he wanted to go. Like he’d rather be with Loraine than me ‘n I’m his stupid twin after all! Sometimes I hate him for leavin’ me. When I saw him leave, well, I just let him go. Maybe if I’d just tried to stop him he woulda stayed. I didn’t know if I’ll ever get over bein’ mad him.  
If I took that quiz ’bout Downton Abbey I’d probly be one a them mean boys that makes life miserable for Anna ‘n Ivy ‘n Daisy.

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